Chofetz Chaim – Introduction (4)

I thought about why so many people have stopped taking this sin seriously, and I saw there are many reasons - some for ordinary people and some for learned people.

Ordinary people do not know that lashon hara is forbidden even when it is true. Learned people know that lashon hara includes true things, but the yetzer hara (evil inclination) fools them.

Sometimes it argues that the person being spoken about is wicked, so it is allowed to speak about him, because it is a mitzvah to expose the wicked. Sometimes it says: this person is a troublemaker who starts fights, so you may speak lashon hara about him. Sometimes it tempts him with the leniency of "apei telata" (something said in front of three people), and sometimes with the leniency of "apei mara" (something one would say in front of the person himself) - convincing him, while he speaks, that he would say the same thing to the person's face. The yetzer hara reminds him of all the sources that fit these leniencies.

Sometimes it convinces him that what he is saying is not lashon hara at all - for example, when he says someone is not smart.

The general rule: it either convinces a person that his words are not lashon hara, or that the Torah did not forbid speaking about this particular person.

When the yetzer hara sees these arguments are not enough, it uses the opposite trick. It shows him that everything counts as lashon hara, so it is impossible to live in this world without cutting oneself off from all worldly matters. This is like the words of the cunning snake (Bereishis 3:1), "Did G-d indeed say – Do not eat from all the trees of the garden?"

Also, many people do not know that it is forbidden to accept lashon hara - that is, to believe it in one's heart. It is only allowed to be careful in case it is true. They also do not know how to fix the sin if they already spoke lashon hara or rechilus (gossip that causes conflict).

Because of all these reasons, the whole matter has fallen apart, and people say whatever comes out of their mouths. They do not stop to think whether it is lashon hara. They are so used to this sin that many do not think it is a sin at all. Even if someone asks a person who is speaking lashon hara, "Why did you speak lashon hara and rechilus?" he thinks the other person is trying to turn him into a saint, and he does not accept the rebuke, because he sees that everyone ignores this matter.

All this happens because the laws of lashon hara and rechilus were never gathered in one place with all their details explained. Instead, they are scattered all over the Talmud and the halachic books. Even the Rambam (Hilchos De'os, chapter 7) and Rabbeinu Yonah (Sha'arei Teshuva) did not lay out a clear path in these laws. They wrote very briefly, as was the way of the Rishonim (early authorities), and many laws are not in their words.